–Devendra Kumar Budakoti
A recent petition filed before the Uttarakhand High Court by adult petitioners from different religious backgrounds highlights a larger social question surrounding marriage, family and community in India. The petitioners sought assistance in getting married as their families and relatives were opposing their alliance and had allegedly threatened them with serious consequences. The court directed the concerned police stations to provide the petitioners with necessary assistance and security.
While marriages outside caste and community—exogamy—are becoming increasingly visible, marriage within one’s caste, community or religion—endogamy—remains the dominant social norm. Any departure from established marriage practices is often strongly resisted by families and kinship groups. In some cases, those who challenge these norms face social ostracism, family disputes, legal battles and considerable psychological trauma.
The court’s intervention also reminds us of the observation of the eminent sociologist Andre Beteille: “A Constitution may indicate the direction in which we are to move, but the social structure will decide how far we are able to move and at what pace.”
Migration, urbanisation, higher education and changing employment patterns have transformed the social fabric of Indian towns and cities. Family and kinship structures are also undergoing significant changes, with consequences for traditional patterns of endogamy.
The younger generation increasingly interacts with people from different caste, class, religious and ethnic backgrounds in educational institutions, workplaces and social spaces. Such interactions naturally create friendships and, in some cases, romantic relationships. Nevertheless, resistance remains strong in several sections of society, particularly when caste, religious or community boundaries are crossed.
Indian parents often remain deeply involved in their children’s marital choices because marriage is not viewed merely as a relationship between two individuals. It is traditionally regarded as an alliance between two families and, in a broader sense, between kinship networks.
This raises an important question: Should India increasingly look towards Western societies, where parents are generally less involved in their children’s marital choices, careers, family lives and divorces? Or should India continue to preserve its distinctive family-centred social structure while allowing individuals greater freedom in choosing their partners?
In India, parents worry about marriage precisely because the family remains central to social life. Marriage connects families and kinship networks and helps sustain cultural continuity. Patterns of marriage, family organisation, kinship, language, traditions and rituals have historically played an important role in holding Indian society together.
Inter-religious marriages remain particularly sensitive. Such alliances can face strong opposition from families, relatives and sections of the wider community. The involvement of the police and courts in protecting couples who wish to marry against family opposition is increasingly visible.
This raises another important question: How far should the police and courts be required to intervene in disputes arising from personal and family choices? More importantly, can the Uniform Civil Code (UCC) contribute to greater harmony in marriage alliances and gradually weaken rigid endogamous practices in Indian society?
The UCC may provide a common legal framework for certain aspects of personal law, but changing marriage practices involves more than legislation. Social attitudes, family structures, caste identities, religious beliefs and community norms are deeply embedded in Indian society. The law can provide rights and protection; social change, however, often takes considerably longer.
The real question, therefore, may not be whether the UCC alone can facilitate exogamy, but whether a changing Indian society is ready to accept greater freedom in marriage while maintaining the social and cultural bonds that have traditionally held families and communities together.
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The Author is a sociologist, alumni of JNU-New Delhi. His research is quoted in the books of Nobel laureate Pro. Amartya Sen
